Becoming a coach as a second career, especially “at my age,” felt a little crazy at first. Although coaching and mentoring had always been part of my leadership journey, stepping into this role as a formal profession raised questions I hadn’t anticipated.
Who am I to do this? Am I too late? Will anyone take me seriously?
Doubts and judgments crept in, as they often do when we reach for something meaningful. However, the passion driving me forward was too strong to ignore. Deep down, I knew I had something valuable to offer: insights gained through decades of experience and a genuine desire to help others grow.
To navigate this transition, I returned to six foundational practice tools I had used and modeled as a leader and ones I now teach my clients. These aren’t quick fixes or superficial strategies; they are the building blocks of authentic confidence, the kind that empowers you to pursue your goals, even when fear threatens to hold you back.
Recognize and Build Strengths
Confidence begins with awareness: recognizing the valuable qualities you already possess.
Often, we underestimate our strengths because they come naturally to us. We downplay them with phrases like, “It’s no big deal,” or “Everyone can do that.” However, this is rarely the case. Whether it’s your ability to remain calm in chaos, motivate a team, or listen with compassion, your strengths are unique to you, and they hold significant power.
Take some time to reflect on the qualities that have helped you navigate past challenges. Consider asking trusted peers what they admire about your leadership or presence. The more you connect with your unique value, the stronger your foundation will become.
Here’s an exercise for you: Make a list of five strengths that have contributed to your success, not just at work, but in life as a whole. Keep this list in a prominent place where you can see it regularly. Let it serve as a reminder of who you truly are.
Challenge Negative Thoughts
Our inner critic is often louder than reality. It whispers discouraging thoughts such as:
- You’re not qualified.
- You’re too late.
- You’ll fail, and everyone will know.
These thoughts can feel so convincing that we treat them as facts, but they are just thoughts. You have the power to challenge them.
When a limiting belief surfaces, take a moment to pause and ask yourself:
- What’s the actual evidence here?
- What would I say to a friend who felt this way?
- What’s a more empowering thought I can choose?
Confidence doesn’t require silencing your fears; it requires responding to them with truth and compassion.
"You are one decision away from a completely different life." – Mel Robbins.
Every time you choose a thought that supports you rather than sabotages you, you shift the trajectory of your life even in small, powerful ways.
Face Your Fears
Fear and growth often walk hand in hand. Waiting to feel confident before taking action is like waiting for the rain to stop before diving into the pool. Confidence is built by facing what scares us, especially when we approach it in manageable doses. Each courageous step you take, no matter how small, reinforces your belief in yourself.
When I launched my coaching business, I wasn't fearless; I was determined. I chose to act despite my fears, and with each step, the next one became easier.
What fear can you confront today to move closer to your goals? Start there. Action breeds clarity and confidence.
Surround Yourself with Supportive People
Confidence flourishes through connection; we are not meant to journey alone. Surround yourself with individuals who reflect your strengths, celebrate your growth, and gently challenge your self-imposed limits. This could be a coach, a mentor, a friend, or a supportive community of like-minded individuals.
In my personal journey, the encouragement of others allowed me to see myself more clearly, especially on the days when self-doubt crept in. Their belief in me served as a mirror, helping me to believe in myself as well.
Confidence is not just an internal process; it is also a relational one. Embrace the reminder from others of your own brilliance.
Practice Self-Compassion & Take Care of Yourself
Confidence isn’t something that comes from constantly pushing yourself or hustling non-stop, especially during challenging times. It flourishes when you trust yourself, and that trust becomes stronger when you take the time to care for yourself.
It's essential to speak to yourself with compassion. Give yourself permission to rest when you need it. Nourish not just your body, but also your spirit. By prioritizing your needs, you send a powerful message to yourself: I matter. I am worthy. I have what it takes to overcome difficulties.
Remember, the way you treat yourself in challenging moments can have a significant impact on your confidence. It can either uplift you or weigh you down. Choose kindness towards yourself, always.
Celebrate Successes
Don’t let your achievements slip by in the hustle of chasing your next goal! Taking a moment to recognize and celebrate both your big and small victories can supercharge your confidence! Acknowledging these successes sends a powerful signal to your brain, sparking possibility and progress like never before!
Did you finally hit "send" on that email you’ve been putting off? Time to throw a mini celebration! Did you stride into that meeting feeling grounded and ready to shine? Celebrate that achievement! And if you took a bold leap toward your dream? That definitely calls for a joyful celebration!
You don’t need anyone’s permission to feel proud. Own that feeling! You’ve earned it!
Here’s an exciting idea: create a “success jar” or maintain a digital log of your weekly wins. It’s a fantastic way to revisit those moments whenever doubt tries to creep in. Let’s celebrate your journey!
Final Thought: Confidence Is a Compass
Confidence is not a one-time achievement; it’s a powerful journey you nurture over time. It’s both a practice and a choice, a quiet inner knowing that assures you, “I trust myself to figure this out.”
This mindset has been pivotal in my transition into coaching, and it’s what I help my clients reclaim every day. Whether you’re stepping into a new role, launching a business, or rediscovering your voice, confidence is the compass that leads you back to your true self and your destined path.
As Mel Robbins wisely stated, "Confidence is the willingness to try."
If you are ready to rebuild or strengthen your confidence, I would love to connect. You don’t have to go through this journey alone.
Take the Next Step Toward Confidence
Confidence is a journey, and growth starts with reflection.
To support you on this journey, I’ve created two free downloadable tools designed to meet you wherever you are:
The Confidence Worksheet
This quick and focused exercise helps you reflect on the six core practices outlined in this blog, enabling you to take immediate and intentional action. It’s perfect for a quick confidence boost or a midweek reset. [Download Your Free Worksheet]
The Confidence Journal
This guide offers a deeper, more spacious reflection for those ready to explore the beliefs, fears, and possibilities that shape their confidence story. It is ideal for personal development, leadership growth, or coaching sessions. [Download Your Free Journal]
✨ Download one or both!
Use these tools to reconnect with your strengths, clarify your goals, and take bold, aligned steps forward.
Remember, you don’t need to have everything figured out, just the courage to begin.
Let’s Keep the Conversation Going
Leadership is a journey and you don’t have to navigate it alone. Subscribe to the Kallis Leadership Coaching blog for fresh insights, practical strategies, and inspiration to help you reflect, align, and act with purpose.
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